Things I hate about Christmas

  1. House cleaning. It won’t stay that way long, no matter how hard we try.
  2. The frenetic schedule. Nothing else gets done in the month.
  3. Parking lots. Really packed parking lots. And all of the accompanying traffic.
  4. Retail music. Really!  You can’t escape it.
  5. Nobody’s that happy. Or relentlessly chipper. And don’t try to goad me into it. Or guilt me, either.
  6. Cardboard boxes. Stacks of empty ones take up too much space, there’s rarely one that fits your need, and then all the wrapped ones soon won’t be, meaning trash to haul out.
  7. Pine needles everywhere from all the garlands around the house. They really start dropping overnight.
  8. Piles of dirty dishes. We do eat well, though.
  9. Waiting for everyone to get up on Christmas morning. Unless I’m really asleep.
  10. Having to wait for the cookies to finally become fair game.

Technically, most of this is actually Advent. The real 12 Days of Christmas are another matter, something I’ve thoroughly come to appreciate.

 

That ‘X’ in Xmas isn’t what most folks think

Considering that X is also the Roman numeral for ten, here goes this week’s Tendrils.

  1. X, or Chi, is the first letter in Greek for Christ. Thus, using it as shorthand for the Yule holiday has nothing to do with striking Christ out of holiday celebrations.
  2. Applied to the English word Christmas, the use dates from the 1500s. Elsewhere, the use of ‘X’ for Christ goes back to at least the fourth century.
  3. It did take me a while in doing genealogy research of the 1600s to realize that Xpher was the name Christopher.
  4. Only half of Americans attend religious services on Christmas Eve or Day.
  5. The holiday was widely ignored in Colonial America. For that matter, the first session of the U.S. Congress was held on December 25, 1789. It wasn’t until 1870 that Christmas was proclaimed a federal holiday.
  6. Turkey is edging out ham as the centerpiece of the Christmas dinner in America. It’s even a big day for cranberry, perhaps surpassing Thanksgiving. Swan and peacock were earlier favorites, though I’m not sure where.
  7. The Rockefeller Center tree started out small. The first one, in 1931, was undecorated. Two years later, one appeared with lights. Each year afterward saw a bigger tree, culminating in the familiar giant that boasts more than 50,000 LED lights.
  8. Christmas caroling was originally mostly drunken men going door to door and making a nuisance of themselves. And then the unemployed poor took over with their begging bowls.
  9. The oldest Santa parade in the U.S. is in Peoria, Illinois, dating from 1888. Apparently, it’s played well there.
  10. The original Christmas pudding was a soup made of raisins and wine.

Fir tipping is a big job around here

The signs “fir tippers wanted” this time of year can be puzzling, so here’s the scoop for those of you who don’t live in Maine.

  1. Christmas wreath makers need stands of evergreens to shape into their festive rings. In Maine, the traditional material is the tips of balsam fir branches. Don’t confuse the inch-long needles for spruce or hemlock.
  2. “Tippers” are the folks who have the skills to collect tips that usually range between 12 to 20 inches.
  3. Quality needles are found only in the mid-section of the tree. Tops and bottoms are deemed unsuitable.
  4. The season is short. The greens cannot be collected before the “tips” are set when a tree goes dormant for winter, usually around November 1, and that’s if the stand has had three nights of 20-degree or lower nights. (Beware of global warning.) Any earlier and the tips lose their needles prematurely. But the wreath-makers do need to get the product to market before Christmas Day, too. It gets busy.
  5. Millions of wreaths are crafted in the state each Christmas season. The trees are abundant and the fir branches are easily worked. Balsam is pleasant to smell, too.
  6. The work is a welcome boost in income for many rural families and comes after the crops are in.
  7. Tips can be harvested by a firm grasp between forefinger and thumb followed by a quick downward motion. Loppers or pruners do the trick for more out-of-the-way tips.
  8. Skilled tippers leave enough on a tree for it to recover in about three years.
  9. The tips are commonly gathered on a “stick” made of a small conifer stripped of most of its branches. When the stick has 40 to 75 pounds of tips, it’s carried off. Bundling the tips into smaller bunches is another method of transport.
  10. Tippers do need to get permission before harvesting from a site. Sometimes that means paying a fee for a permit.

– Source: University of Maine Cooperative Extension Service

Gertrude Stein could quick to the cut 

She does show up in my sets of art gallery poems, accompanied by Norman Rockwell, for good reason, if only a fictional role.

Here are ten things she really said.

  1. “We are always the same age inside.”
  2. “Why should a sequence of words be anything but a pleasure?”
  3. “It takes a lot of time to be a genius. You have to sit around so much, doing nothing, really doing nothing.”
  4. “The thing that differentiates man from animals is money.”
  5. “A writer should write with his eyes and a painter paint with his ears.”
  6. “Literature – creative literature – unconcerned with sex, is inconceivable.”
  7. “I always say that you cannot tell what a picture really is or what an object really is until you dust it every day and you cannot tell what a book is until you type it or proof-read it. It then does something to you that only reading it never can do.”
  8. “It is always a mistake to be plain-spoken.”
  9. “Money is always there but the pockets change.”
  10. “America is my country, and Paris is my home town.”

For the art gallery poems, go to my blog Thistle Finch editions.

 

In case you need encouragement on that novel

Yes, for those of you writers who should be well past the halfway point of your new novel draft by this time this month. As well as any others, working at whatever.

  1. “I think all writing is a disease. You can’t stop it.” – William Carlos Williams, M.D.
  2. “Each writer is born with a repertory company in his head. Shakespeare has perhaps 20 players. I have 10 or so, and that’s a lot. As you get older, you become more skillful at casting them.” – Gore Vidal
  3. “A writer never has a vacation. For a writer life consists of either writing or thinking about writing.” – Eugene Ionesco
  4. “We write to taste life twice, in the moment and in retrospect.” – Anais Nin
  5. “The very reason I write is so that I might not sleepwalk through my entire life.” – Zadie Smith
  6. “The good writing of any age has always been the product of someone’s neurosis.” – William Styron
  7. “No matter what people tell you, words and ideas can change the world.” – Robin Williams
  8. “After nourishment, shelter and companionship, stories are the thing we need most in the world.” – Philip Pullman
  9. “Words can be like X-rays if you use them properly – they’ll go through anything. You read and you’re pierced.” – Aldous Huxley
  10. “The purpose of a writer is to keep civilization from destroying itself.” – Albert Camus