Flowers in the compost
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Tag: Humor
Singing over beers
So there we were after choir rehearsal, more than 20 of us gathered for what’s called a pub sing.
It’s commonplace in England and Ireland, I suppose, but a rarity in the States.
In fact, this was my first encounter. One of our members had reserved a room at a tavern down the street.
Our Boston Revels organization hosts public versions of these during the year, but this was more impromptu. Yes, we had a stack of the organization’s songbooks, just in case. As our motto states, “Where tradition comes to life.”
Two of those present had birthdays, so we belted out in the traditional Happy Birthday song, in glorious four-part harmony – maybe more.
And then one basso voice continued in a dark melody with lyrics like “long ago your hair turned gray, now it’s falling out, they say,” or “it’s your birthday, never fear, you’ll be dead this time next year.” He was quickly joined by a soprano across the table in what became a competition to see who could remember lines the other didn’t know.
For those with a mordant sense of humor, it’s (UHH!) great fun. You can even Google it under the “Happy Birthday Dirge.” For the record, we sang it much better than any of the versions you’ll hear there.
Fortunately, my birthday had slipped past unnoticed just a few weeks earlier.
Maybe next year?
Look again
NOTRE
DAVE
I once gave up fish for Lent
Original? Turns out the Eastern Orthodox do this, too … every year.
Seven acts of faith
Hopping in the shower (expecting hot water)
Assuming the food won’t be poisoned
Pumping what they say is gasoline
Sleeping . And dreaming
Banking
Putting an envelope in the mail
Traveling . In any direction
Another reason for gratitude having a studio in the attic of an old house
Just think of all the exercise I wouldn’t get if we had a ranch house.
PLAYING WITH CROWNS, LIKE IN CHECKERS
Last week, I wrote about relearning Spanish and the tree of Crowns the online Duolingo course uses.
As I’ve been earning Lingots for rebuilding those, I’ve had a series of sessions where I’m presented with a sentence or phrase to translate and a set of mosaics or buttons to choose from, one word on each. It’s kind of like a Magnetic Poetry Kit, except that you have to click on the word you want.
In the first hour of my day, my mind wants to run off in whimsical directions.
Here are a few examples.
Approved answer: The girl wants sugar on her apple.
Rejected answer: The girl wants sugar on her husbands.
(Or just a sugar daddy?)
Approved: Are you going to school today?
Rejected: Are you going downstairs today?
(There are days we don’t want to get out of bed, right?)
Approved: I want to go to the movies with my friends.
Rejected: I want to go to the movies with my girlfriend.
(Except that she doesn’t like the action-adventure stuff we do?)
Approved: I always go to work by bus.
Rejected: I always go to work by duck.
(There’s an opera about a guy who goes to work on a big swan. I’d settle on a big yellow duck, wouldn’t you?)
Approved: Do you have to work today?
Rejected: Do you have to speak today?
(Some days simply speaking is a lot of work … especially if it’s in Spanish. That’s the polite explanation. The other one is “Firme la boca,” I think.)
Approved: We don’t open the messages.
Rejected: We don’t open the refrigerator.
(You never know what’s inside.)
Approved: We are buying a car.
Rejected: We are buying a brother.
(Hope he’s worth it.)
Approved: My husband never gets up with me.
Rejected: My husband never gets up on me.
(That would lead to a lot of words we haven’t learned yet.)
Approved: I want a modern kitchen.
Rejected: I want a modern husband.
Also rejected: I want a modern dog.
(Oh, don’t even try to make the connection. Puleeze!)
