It’s a fair question in my novel What’s Left.
Just what do we owe to our ancestors?
Tag: Life
Infidelity
I promised to leave the door open
no matter what
vainly hoping a pearl would appear
in the rusting lock
as if she would ever again wear it
~*~
yes, I left it open
but don’t live there anymore
Hail, Xenia
assuming you’ll never see frail fragrant blossoms pendulous as an archway in the museum I parachute from our embrace so wide open I’ll drift a mile in the bobbing fullness of an eggshell antiquity . clearly, our love of your plump dreams would feast, yes, pray, at last lifting these arms together . maybe nothing more than the snap of the cord could be lovelier
Some things to reflect on as we’re coming out of Covid restrictions
- We learned to Zoom. As much as I missed face-to-face and the subtle interactions there, Zoom did spare us a lot of driving. Sometimes it was a treat not having to leave home.
- We saved a bucket of money, apart from takeout. Well, Amazon made out like a bandit, but local retail took a big hit.
- We used less cash, if any, while credit card use for small items exploded.
- Kids lost a year-and-a-half of the growing-up experience. School events like the homecoming, prom, and graduation, as well as classroom learning, team sports, summer camp. I really feel for them, and their teachers. Can we make it up to them now?
- For worship communities, shut-ins and folks at a distance could tune in and be part again. But we definitely missed singing together.
- It’s triggered a big population relocation and a real estate frenzy. So how do we feel about working from home rather than an office? Or the opportunity to live anywhere we want and dial in?
- Arts, artists, and arts organizations suffered most of all. They need our renewed support, bigtime.
- As our astute son-in-law quipped, it was a year without culture. He was talking about sporting events, but it really fit across the board. We couldn’t even really get together as a book club.
- Going about without those masks feels refreshing. Or even naked.
- What’s your reaction to going up to the checkout counter and noticing the plexiglass barrier isn’t there anymore?
And, oh yes, we learned to spell coronavirus and even pronounce it.
What’s high on your own list of takeaways?
A family obligation to pitch in
Maybe the family restaurant was oppressive? In my novel What’s Left, there’s no question the kids won’t be working shifts in Carmichael’s as they grow up. Do they ever want to rebel? Or does peer pressure and pride keep them in line?
As one of them said in an earlier draft:
So it was off to serve more Streetcars and slaw.
~*~
Well, they knew what was expected. And they knew how to pitch in and be effective.
What were you expected to do in your family? How did you help? Were you compensated in return? Should you have been?
Now, make all that present tense!
~*~
Things I dislike about my appearance
- For years, I had very crooked teeth. Finally fixed, about 25 years ago!
- I’m tall and still office-bound.
- Concave chest. Genetic endowment, I suppose.
- Bony knees.
- Balding.
- And graying.
- Overall aging!
- Having to wear reading glasses.
- Skinny, underweight, all my life.
- Pot belly, at times. How unfair!
~*~
Anyone else want to confess?
Oh, brother! Watch out when he’s bossy
When a family-owned business has two siblings at the helm, how effectively they resolve conflicts – or ignore them – is crucial. As one well-known New England brother has said, he learned that family was more important than always being right. In their case, it worked. They even became TV stars in their ads. I suppose there were other corrective mechanisms behind the scenes or ones that would kick in later. We’ll see the biz school case study in time, no doubt. On the other hand, differences can also lead to lawsuits, the breakup of the company, even its sale to rivals, perhaps followed by a longstanding refusal to speak to each other. We’ve also seen those headlines.
Do you know of any businesses like this?
Cairo syrup, my dear
a sinkhole garden viewed from that kitchen window as a kind of sphinx with beanpole pyramids when you were young, the world seemed limitless just see what we’ve found since, in the perimeters of a root canal while watching a grosbeak feeding merrily at the other side of the dentist’s window painlessly, as promised . keep smiling
My favorite smaller cities and towns
Being a college town really makes a difference. My selections are definitely skewered by the stretch of the country I’ve lived in.
Here goes:
- Dover, New Hampshire (population 32,191): Yes, my provenance for two decades and the source for much of the material here at the Red Barn.
- Portsmouth, New Hampshire (21,927): Just a dozen or so miles down the road from us, the Port City is wealthier and more tourist oriented, especially around the photogenic harbor. With a strong Colonial flavor, thanks to its array of mansions, it’s a prime example of a New England seaport, a category that could easily lead to its own Tendrils entry.
- Portland, Maine (66,215/metro area of a half million): A hour up the Interstate from Dover, the Forest City is the center of a third of the state’s population, as counted in the metro area. The Old Port District is especially charming and pedestrian friendly.
- Brunswick, Maine (20,278): A bit further on is the home of Bowdoin College and a fun-to-explore downtown. I love its Vietnamese restaurant.
- Eastport, Maine (1,331): And much further up the coast is this much shrunken city that’s fighting for survival. No college, though. No Laundromat, either, or pizza parlor. Its saving grace is an spunky arts scene and the ocean, including a really deep-water port. As you’re seeing, it’s won our hearts … enough to lure us from Dover.
- Port Townsend, Washington (9,704): Jumping to the other side of the continent, this artsy community on the Olympic Peninsula relies on ferry service across Puget Sound for access to about everything other than the mountains and forests at its back. It’s also home to a state park dedicated to the arts.
- Ellensburg, Washington (21,111): Situated in the desert east of Seattle, this small college town blends Wild West atmosphere with outdoors opportunities, including the Yakima Canyon. You may have seen it in the TV series “Northern Exposure.”
- Yellow Springs, Ohio (3,487): Returning back across the heartland, I thought about adding Iowa City or Madison, Wisconsin, but don’t know enough about either to speak fluently. Yellow Springs, long the home of bohemian Antioch College, fills the bill for me with its small-town New England touches and the Glen Helen Nature Preserve.
- Bloomington, Indiana (85,000): Set in a wooded, rolling landscape, it’s the home of Big Ten Indiana University and its plethora of cultural opportunities. It also bears a passing resemblance to Daffodil in a few of my novels.
- Burlington, Vermont (42,417): Look, it’s the biggest city in the Green Mountain State and has Lake Champlain at its foot and great views of the Adirondacks beyond. It’s also about as hippie crunchy as you can get, though it helps if your grandparents set you up with a trust fund or two. You might consider Middlebury as an alternative.
~*~
I can think of some suburban Boston communities, but that would be cheating, wouldn’t it?
Your turn to weigh in with worthy nominations!
More than the bottom line
Even though I cut this from the final version of my novel What’s Left, it’s still true:
What people need, and this is essential to a proper approach to labor, is balance.
~*~
Two things are going on here, one inside the other, but I’d like to be less confusing.
The first, quite simply, is my belief in what we Quakers call centering. We find our stopping all outwork activity for a time of deep meditation and reflection helps bring us perspective on the other parts of our lives. Add to that moderation and simplicity or focus all leading to a healthy balance of individuality, home, career, community, faith, and so on.
The second touches on attitudes toward labor itself, which quite frankly has been demeaned in modern society. What makes the concept of leisure so exalted? The danger, I suspect, is in overworking — often sucking any joy out of the project at hand.
Think of your job. What could management do to make it more human?
~*~
Jnana's Red Barn 